Random Musings

Okay, so I've never actually been tested for and diagnosed with ADD (notice not ADHD...I don't have the hyperactivity). This minor fact does not prevent me from making a self-diagnosis, however. Even writing this blog up to this point has taken me a good 7 minutes because I keep thinking of other things...like how long it's been since I last painted my toenails.

If you could be a professional (or hold amateur status for that matter), I think I would kick some major hiney in the ADD Olympics. What would those events even look like? Would it be like who can stay on the rings the longest before getting so bored they switch to the uneven bars?
Mmm...Paul Hamm is an attractive gymnast.
I used to do gymnastics in grade school.
My gym teacher in grade school wore a toupee...which came flying off frequently.
Squirrels around campus fly from tree to tree.
Carly likes to chase the squirrels because she thinks they're evil.
I like monkeys.
They swing from tree to tree as well, even though I've never seen one in person.
I've also never seen Spiderman II.
Saryl was GREAT at being Spiderman during initiations...GO WEB GO!!!
Maybe one of these days Dr. Tandy will put some sour candy in his drawer.
I'm graduating in 89 days.
The bagel sandwich I had for lunch was amazing.
I like working out three times a week.
My back really really hurts (stinkin' kid jumping on me).
I bet my sword-fighting skills are better than his (even though he's 7 and I'm 22)

Wow...sorry for that tangent...now what was I saying???

Posted by Christi at 1/31/2005 03:07:00 PM | Permalink | Comments

Continuing in the pursuit of revealing the little things that make me happy... my next thought has finally made the list.

Drum roll please...

Nothing feels better in the morning than a 30 minute, almost scalding hot shower.

Now, before you jump to conclusions about the correlation between girls and length of showers...well...go ahead and jump to that conclusion because I must confess that this is almost an everyday occurence for me. It's not that it takes me 30 minutes to do the normal cleansing activities of a shower, it's the fact that first thing in the morning (when it's still a bit chilly because you've been warmed by your blankets all night long), it feels so fantastic to just stand underneath the hot water coming down...doing nothing...just standing there.

It almost makes me want to start singing "When peace like a shower attendeth my morn..." Okay, that's cheesy, I know...but that's me.

Posted by Christi at 1/29/2005 01:47:00 PM | Permalink | Comments

At the end of this blog reading, you may say to yourself..."She's single, she doesn't know anything about it. You'll see, it will change when she's put in that scenario." And to you I must bluntly say, "Grow up."

It is ever so apparent to me that I am caught in the middle of what Brian Simmons (in his Family class) would call the "Marriage Squeeze." Simply put, the marriage squeeze is the idea that a certain people group feels (and feels correctly) that there is no one of the opposite sex in their same people group worth their time, trouble, and affection in the process of finding a suitable marriage partner. Statistically speaking, church of Christ females in the United States within the college age bracket are in a marriage squeeze (because there are more single females in this group than acceptable males who are still single).

With this information fresh in my mind, I look at my surroundings and I really have to ask, "Are you stinkin' kidding me???" I see young men and women (CHRISTIAN young men and women) distorting and sculpting themselves into unrecognizable molds so that they will gain the attention and affection of the opposite sex. Is there such a desperation for marriage that people are willing to change their entire beings to find someone? Is the fear of being alone so great that you compromise everything you once held dear?

This is where my bias comes in hardcore. I am so tired of losing perfectly good friends once they have added the title "boyfriend/girlfriend" to their social resumes. Is there some unwritten, unspoken law that says once you find yourself in a relationship you have to forsake all those you once knew, and spend time ONLY with your significant other? Is the worth of your new found relationship equivalent to the cost of the people in your life you once cherished as friends?

Please do not get me wrong, I am not saying that I stop being friends with people when they get into a relationship. What I am saying is that once people get into a relationship, the trend is that they burn all bridges leading back to their previous social circle, never to be heard from again. My next question is, "When you break up with your significant other, who do you turn to?" I mean, you've already burned the bridges to your former friends. This is something that I struggle with. I don't believe that I am so petty that I would never forgive a friend who has done this to me. I would truly love it if some of my friends came back. But there will forever be a tension in knowing that something so temporary had the ability to replace me so quickly.

Now it's time for some application. I never want to become one of those people who complains about something only to one day turn into the very thing that she once complained about. So...please, as my friends, slap my wrist and shave me bald if I ever a.) become a person so fluid in the concept of myself that I have to change the very essence of my being to please the opposite sex, or b.) let a man into my life who is not strong enough to hold true to who he knows himself to be just to be with me. Any relationship that I may choose to pursue now or anytime in the future will consist of what I would like to call maturity and a mutual appreciation/respect for the individuals involved.

I've made a lot of very bold statements in this blog (which I usually try to stay away from), but this has really struck an emotional chord inside me and I needed to get it out. Feel free to agree/disagree. I would love to hear some input.

Posted by Christi at 1/27/2005 10:08:00 PM | Permalink | Comments

I'm finally done transferring the posts from my livejournal blog onto here. I wish I were smart enough to post the responses that have already been given to them...but oh well. I hope you enjoy...whoever you may be.
Stay tuned for more blogging goodness.

Posted by Christi at 1/26/2005 08:36:00 PM | Permalink | Comments

I don't really know if I'm excited...or a little ticked off...

I recently enrolled in an extra course on the epistles of John. I'm taking it through the Imago Dei School of Theology (Imago Dei is a 4-year old church plant in Portland). The School of Theology was created for Christians to come and further their knowledge (very simply put). Anyone can come, and the motivcation is that it's FREE!!! So when I signed up for the class I had a very fluffy idea of what would go on. I thought maybe some devotional readings of the epistles, maybe a little exegetical work (nothing too deep of course), and that would be it.

Tonight was the first class in the eight-week course. I was blown away! For two hours we dove right into the central themes of 1 John, the authorship of John, his theological standpoint, issues that are presented, criteria that we are expected to meet in the class, and everything else that we should learn to expect in the next 8 weeks. Oh, and did I mention that the class is being taught be a real seminary professor? Yeah, he's a full time faculty member at Western Seminary. He's incredibly knowledgeable, and very friendly which makes things all the better (and he already likes me because I've taken Greek).

So the question I pose to you is this...

Why have I paid, oh I dunno, a bazillion dollars to receive an education when I could have just driven down the road and gotten my Bible education for free (and probably just as high of quality)? (At this point in my ramblings, please do not look below to my Ode to Cascade blog).

All joking aside, I am really excited about the direction of this class. In one class I have already learned so much, so I can only anticipate what it will be like for the next 7 weeks.

If you're in the Portland area, you should go with me!

Posted by Christi at 1/26/2005 08:35:00 PM | Permalink | Comments

A question was recently posed to me that went a little like this...

Is it wrong to want to better yourself (to try to become a better person) with the wrong motives? For example...say you're a compulsive shopper, but instead of trying to stop your habit to gain financial control of your own life, you try to control your habit because you know the opposite sex of your choosing would never date/marry/elope/whatever anyone who was not financially wise. Okay, bad example, but the principles are still the same.

So...is it wrong? Technically, you are still trying to make yourself better. The jury is still out in my opinion.

Lemme know what you think!

Posted by Christi at 1/26/2005 08:34:00 PM | Permalink | Comments

Sometimes I force myself to take the time to think about the little things in life. The things that really make me happy deserve a little recognition. Every once in a while I will update this blog with some of those things.

Tonight is the first entry where I am choosing to reveal one of those little things that ultimately make me happy.

It is all found in a processed chicken breast sandwich. I know...ICK...right? NO WAY!!! Take a little sourdough bread, spread a thin layer of mayonaise on one piece, add some Tillamook cheddar cheese and a few slices of processed meat, and BAM! Eternal bliss...or at least until there is none left.

Stay tuned for further insight into some of the weird things that make my mind whirl!!!

Posted by Christi at 1/26/2005 08:34:00 PM | Permalink | Comments

Tonight at Summit we discussed the idea of finding God amongst our sometimes strange culture.

I'm just curious...where do you see God in culture today? What movies have you seen that portray Christian ethics without outright telling you that they're there? What kind of music do you listen to with godly messages? How has religion kept its place in a society that claims to not be rooted in ethic?

Lemme know what you think.

Posted by Christi at 1/26/2005 08:33:00 PM | Permalink | Comments

I've always heard the term, "(something) in a nutshell." Well, tonight I propose that my life is seen as an eggshell (which has no relevance whatsoever to the phrase just used).

This weekend I was part of the staff at a retreat for junior high and high school teenagers. It was amazing. One of the object lessons involved boiled eggs. Everyone got their own egg and was asked to take the shell off. Once we were left with tiny fragmentations of eggshell and a pugnant odor of egg on our hands, we were asked to put the eggshell back onto the egg. I thought I had it figured out since I was able to de-shell my egg in about 5 or 6 fairly large pieces. Hahaha...yeah...funny. As close as I came to rebuilding the structure of my egg, I noticed several small pieces still missing. My egg wasn't as pretty as before either. It was cracked and the shell just didn't fit as well as it had when it was whole. Some people had an even harder time putting their egg back together. Their (and my) egg looked more like strange mosaics rather than a systematic whole.

The point you may ask? There are times in life where our worlds just come crashing down. It's inevitable. A parent at some point is going to die. We are going to continue struggling with that ONE sin (in the midst of many) that we just can't shake. We are going to feel betrayed by friends. If you're anything like me, I feel as though when these trials hit, I can fix them on my own. "I know what I'm doing and I don't need any help from anybody," is the trick that I play on myself. I like to feel independent of everyone else. The problem comes when I look at my life (the egg) that I tried to put back together, and all I'm left with is dents and holes and cracks, and a more pugnant stench than before.

But there is One who is able to take our vulnerable, naked, shell-less bodies and clothe us again and make us whole. All we must do is turn to Him and realize that things can't be done by ourselves. It's okay to admit our faults to the One who created them. That's my challenge...relying on God more than I rely on myself.

Posted by Christi at 1/26/2005 08:32:00 PM | Permalink | Comments

I don't know if I would call it a lack of faith, but for some reason I am constantly amazed at how God works in His people. You'd think that by now I might have it figured out and come to expect such miraculous things from the One who can make them happen. But instead I find myself smacked in the face and in awe of what He does each and every time.

I recently observed a beautiful piece of Divine intervention and it dropped me to my knees. Okay, so say there's this girl who is questioning everything in her life right now. You know the deal: the "Who am I?" "What am I doing here?" "Do I really believe?" In the middle of a crowd, about 40 people, in a time where everyone in the room is worshiping the Creator of the Universe, God decides to use the least likely candidate to speak up out of the crowd and speak to everyone about having enough faith. The illustration came from the story where a woman who had been internally bleeding for many years pushes her way through a large crowd simply to touch the cloak of Jesus because she believes that will heal her. God is waiting for us to step up into a faith where we are outstretching our arms simply to touch his garment because we know that He is the one who brings healing. He is ready to take us in his arms, all we have to do is reach out.

Good story, eh? Well, the Divine intervention comes in because at the very moment that this young man spoke to the crowd about having enough faith, this girl who is questioning is praying, "Okay God, I know what I should be doing, but if I'm really going to do it, then you need to show me a sign. I know you don't really do that kind of thing anymore, but if you could just send a little somethin' my way, that would be great." Also, as I sit next to her pondering what she is thinking at this time, I begin to pray, "God, I don't know why she is going through this right now, but I just pray that you will provide her the answers that she needs." BAM...young man starts speaking about faith.

Thank you, God for the times where I don't think I have enough faith to make things happen. But I know that it's in those times that you take me by the hand and you lead me down the road less traveled. Thank you for your intervention in the life of someone who I care so deeply about. You amaze me, and I'm sorry that it catches me by surprise each time. Help me to have the faith to expect You to take care of my needs and worries.

Posted by Christi at 1/26/2005 08:31:00 PM | Permalink | Comments

Y'know, I've taken a lot of crap over the years for attending Cascade College. After a semester spent in a foreign land (Texas) I came home and took what many have called the easy path. Some may even consider it to not be a "real" education. This livejournal entry is to all of those people who have ever criticized anyone for attending a piece of God-blessed land in the Northwest known as Cascade College. To those people I must say, " BACK UP OFF MY GRILL!!!" :)

In my three and half years of attending Cascade I have learned more about my faith, my God, and myself than I have anywhere else. I have attained an education that has challenged me greatly and has also prepared me well for a life of service in God's kingdom. I value the relationships that have formed with professors like Dr. Tandy who will never be reduced down to just my Christmas card list because he has invested so much in my life that he deserves to know what's going on. It is on this campus that I have learned to think in a different light, to be able to see the God in everything.

Many have also criticized the service clubs that exist on Cascade's campus. Instead of sororities and fraternities, we have male and female service clubs. They exist not to throw parties, but to form a community in which members go out into the Portland area and serve people in the name of Jesus. I've seen people transformed by the love and sisterhood that they experience through what I know as Delta Sigma Rho. These girls have shared struggles, tears, triumphs, and joys with each other, and I know that my life has been richer through what I share with them.

I apologize for the sentimentality of this entry, but it just occurred to me today, as I sat in chapel and as I prayed with the Deltas afterward, that today was the first day of my very last semester. How crazy is that? In 12 short weeks I will have a college degree, I will be moving to Salem, and I will be closing this chapter of my life. Wow...it's been good. Thanks Cascade...for everything.

End mushyness.

Posted by Christi at 1/26/2005 08:30:00 PM | Permalink | Comments

"Someone once said, ' You shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you odd.' Whoever made that statement understood what it means to be a follower of Christ. Followers of Christ are odd. Oddness is important because it is the quality that adds color, texture, variety, beauty to the human condition. Christ doesn't make us the same. What he does is affirm our differentness. Oddness is important because the most dangerous word in Western culture is sameness. Sameness is a virus that infects members of industrialized nations and causes an allergic reaction to anyone who is different. This virus affects the decision-making part of our brains, resulting in an obsession with making the identical choices everyone else is making.

Sameness is a disease with disasterous consequences - differences are ignored, uniqueness is not listened to, our gifts are cancelled out. Life, passion, and joy are snuffed out. Sameness is the result of sin and does much more than infect us with lust and greed; it flattens the human race, franchises us, attempts to make us all homogenous. Sameness is the cemetery where our distinctiveness is buried. In a sea of sameness, no one has an identity. But Christians do have an identity. We are aliens! We are the odd ones, the strange ones, the misfits, the outsiders, the incompatibles. Oddness is a gift from God and sits dormant until God's Spirit gives it life and shape. Oddness is the consequence of following the one who made us unique, different, and IN HIS IMAGE!

In C.S. Lewis' The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe, the White Witch has turned many of the inhabitants of Narnia into stone, but Aslan, the Christ figure, jumps into the stone courtyard, pouncing on the statues, breathing life into them.
'The courtyard looked no longer like a museum; it looked more like a zoo. Creatures were running after Aslan and dancing round him till he was almost hidden in the crowd. Instead of all that deadly white the courtyard was now a blaze of colors; glossy chestnut sides of ccentaurs, indigo horns of unicorns, dazzling plumage of birds, reddy-brown foxes, dogs and satyrs, yellow stockings and crimson hoods of dwarfs; and the birch-girls in silkver, and the beech-girls in fresh, transparent green, and the larch-girls in green so bright that it was almost yellow. And instead of the deadly silence the whole place rang with the sound of happy roarings, brayings, yelpings, barkings, squealings, cooings, neighings, stampings, shouts, hurrahs, songs, and laughter.'

Lewis's summary of what is happening in Narnia is a brilliant description of what the church SHOULD look like: 'The courtyard looked no longer like a museum; it looked more like a zoo.' It is the incongruence and the oddness of our disjointed spirituality that ought to characterize every church. For God so loved the world, that whosoever believes in him will, from that point on, be considered weird by the rest of the world, which means the church should be more like a zoo than a tomb of identical mummies."

~Taken from Messy Spirituality by Michael Yaconelli

Posted by Christi at 1/26/2005 08:29:00 PM | Permalink | Comments

So tonight was the first official "Summit" event for Cascade Hills Church of Christ.

When you turn to the next page in the book of your life, you have to be able to expect completely new experiences as well. Tonight was a first for me. As the appointed youth intern for this new church plant reaching out to south Salem, it is my job to try and build a youth program. I've been a part of a few youth groups, working with them, hanging out, etc. The difference is...they already had an established group. The newness and the challenge comes when there is no formal youth group established, and I'm responsible for developing one. YIKES! This is where all the formal education I have received in youth ministry kicks in.

As I've grown and matured, I have realized several things about myself. One of these things and probably the largest obstacle that I am facing at this point in time is my deep rooted genetic make up to be shy! SHY! Me? YES! There is probably nothing more scary for me than to initiate a conversation with a complete stranger...let alone try to keep the conversation going.

Tonight at Summit I was able to make my first real contact with a teenager from Salem. It's true that I did not invite her there (she's Jason's cousin), but God granted me the boldness to have a wonderful conversation with this 15-year-old girl. Not only did we talk, but Brittany and I are planning on getting together for coffee so that I can get to know her better.

In a book that I recently read regarding mission work, the author makes a point that in a new culture that you are unfamiliar with, all one must do is make a connection to ONE person within that culture and they are the ones that reach the others that are the same as them. The same is true in the story of Jesus with the Samaritan woman at the well in John 4. While the disciples were in town gathering food and supplies, the story does not account for them ministering to anybody. They probably didn't know how since Jews and Samaritans were never socially mixed. But Jesus, being the outstanding example that he is, ministered to one woman from that town and because of it, she went back to her people and told them of Jesus. It's that simple! Maybe Brittany is my in to the youth culture that resides in the Salem area. Hmm...thought provoking.

All of this randomness of thought to say, "Wow...God is amazing!" I don't think I say that enough. God knows what he's doing! Tonight was a perfect example of God's workmanship. Dwayne talked about how we see our world and the concept of reality. What shapes our reality? Why do we see what we see? As a Christian, we naturally realize that it's because of how we see God, his role in the world, and what he has done in our lives that makes us see the world the way we do. For a nonChristian, however, the answer is not so clear.

One more random thought for the night before I turn in. It's amazing to me that not only does the birth of this new church mean new believers coming to know the all-powerful God, but it (for me) also represents the new birth of a new phase in my life. The ministry that I have been longing to do has begun. Yay! :)

Posted by Christi at 1/26/2005 08:26:00 PM | Permalink | Comments

So I was using livejournal for awhile...but I find the style of blogspot to be much more appealing to the eye. Or maybe I'm just a sucker for peer pressure...hahaha...that can't be it. Sorry to all of you faithful livejournal users out there. BUT...I would like to keep all of my livejournal entries active, so I will be posting them on here very soon!

Posted by Christi at 1/26/2005 02:32:00 PM | Permalink | Comments